Dear Ms. Lauper

In response to your enquiry,

"Is that alright?”

which immediately follows the statement,

"I drove all night"

I believe (and I speak as a concerned appreciator of your work), that before this question can be accurately answered, a thorough assessment of your movements and activity in the 24 hours leading to the commencement of your drive is required.

The reasons why this information needs to be garnered are based on the determination of the amount and timing of any sleep and/or alcohol or drugs taken before commencement of your journey, in order to assess the likely influence that fatigue and/or being under the influence of mind-altering substances or prescription medication would have had upon yourself and your ability and judgement whilst in charge of a motor vehicle.

Ergo, if you began driving after a long period of rest and at least 48 hours after partaking of an alcoholic beverage, the answer to your enquiry would be “yes”. If, however, you started your journey immediately after the ingestion of opiates and had not slept in the 18 hours prior to the trip's inception, this would certainly NOT be 'alright', but on the contrary, inconsiderate to other motorists and pedestrians, and, indeed, downright dangerous if not illegal.

I enclose a synopsis of the guidelines laid down by the Police Force, and a questionnaire (which I have designed with the assistance of my neighbour Derek Philpot) for perusal and completion at your earliest convenience. Upon receipt I will undergo a thorough investigation and inform you of my findings.


Wilf Turnbull

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