Dear Shalamar

Re: I Can Make You Feel Good

Thank you for your kind offer, particularly as I appear to be suffering from a rather stiff back and a minor attack of the "snuffles" at present.

I regret, however, that I would require a photocopy of your respective qualifications and credentials before treatment is permitted to commence. This is unfortunately because certain other pop stars claiming medical expertise, namely, "Doctors" Alban, Dre and Robert, were unable or unwilling to supply said documentation when politely requested. In addition, "Sister" Sledge neglected to respond; although, admittedly, she may be a nun. I presume, Shalamar, that a collective group of consultants, as you clearly are, would not be so impolite as to ignore my request, although at the risk of being 'struck off' before even being successfully registered at your practice, I must posit that your pop chart advertisement should have been called 'We Can Make You Feel Good". 

Yours in expectation

Wilf Turnbull

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