Dear The Members

Re: Sound of The Suburbs

As much as my wife Jean and I enjoy doing the washing up to your ''angsty anthem'', which we found last night in the attic featured on a 'compilation CD' of the same name, one fears that the hubbub referenced therein may be atypical of most conventional city outskirt brouhaha.


It is to be conceded, The Members, that an old man washing his car, your mum in the kitchen cooking Sunday dinner, and a woman next-door just sitting and staring outside are not abnormal peripheral metropolitan activities as exercised by ''Normal People'' per se. One does struggle, however, unless he is using a particular noisy hose and both ladies and their immediate environs are, to use a technical term no doubt familiar to you pop stars, ''heavily mic'd up'', to comprehend how said perpetrations may in any way be provincially audible.


Furthermore, unless of course you are referring to a Crowthorne-based woman known to lure nearby sailors to their deaths, one finds it difficult hard to conceive as to how it may be possible to be individually pestered by mechanical warning circuitry. Are you absolutely certain that a Broadmoor siren won't leave you alone?


On a marginally non-germane note, I am slightly confused that you ask Johnny, who stands looking at his window at the night, what he is listening to, when to visually observe does not necessarily require stimuli discernible to the human ear.


All told, Sirs, your humble correspondent, representing, I am confident, ''We The People'', feels justified in declaring that until a full explanatory reply is forthcoming, ''These Are The Unresolved Issues Of The Suburbs'.'


I remain,


Yours sincerely,


Derek Philpott


P.S. Jean wonders, with regard to your erstwhile 'lead singer' Nicky Tesco, if he has any children, and if so, does he refer to any of the little ones as Tesco Express?



Reply from J.C. Carroll received 24/2/2015



Dear Mr Philpott,

Re : These Are The Unresolved Issues Of The Suburbs

Looking at the lyrics to Sound of the Suburbs and seeing your analysis, sent me spinning back in a vortex to 1978 when the original idea for the song entered my head. I shall address your concerns as to the “flawed logic” of the lyrical content of the song later on in my communication but first I must


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